Single in the city :mommy dearest

I do not have a normal relationship with my mother and I envy women who do. At this time of my life especially I try my best to be the best daughter I can and I try to not let the past get to me but it's so hard sometimes everything I manage to have something solid with her she finds a way to mess it up turn it around on me and I'm just sick of it . The fact that I was petrified to bring my children around my mother didn't sit well in my spirit . My mother has had several reasons on why she honestly shouldn't be in my children's life and recently she solidified it . -called my son a monkey and was disgusted that I became pregnant and asked me how could I ruin our families good name (mean while I was married had been for 2 years at that point and loving with my then husband) -was mad that my son looked like his father and called him an ugly child -cursed who she thought was me on the phone and the children where actually speaking with her . -assisted their father unbeknownst to her by speaking badly about me while he taped her. -compared my children with their cousins -assisted so spent a weekend with my children and to my sons horror talked about their cousins the entire time . -called my daughter a Lil snobby,pschyo cry baby to her face . -called my son a fucking two face liar. -told my children while they were crying to get the fuck out of her house she didn't need me or them and she had another set of grandchildren . So with all that being said I'm angry that I even given her the chance to even be allowed to be a thought in my children's life. And this is not to say I think my children are perfect which they are far from that. I believe they are bright and loving and sweet and Lil mini old souls lol . And I think any person would have a benefit to not have my mother in their lives she's not sweet ,she's not doting or nurturing in any aspect and is honestly a very bitter, and negative being but seeing that she is my mother I'm forced in a sense to love her or have some form or respect to her which makes it difficult to have a level of disgust for her actions over the years. I mean how do you not like the person that have birth to you ?